Make this the Best Mother's Day Ever!

I keep seeing ads for Mother's Day. And the tag lines are always much like the title of this blog.

Make this the best mother's day ever!

 Give her the gift she deserves!

Show her you love her with [insert whatever they're selling here]...

I realize not all mothers are going to feel the same way I do, but allow me to speak for the majority of mothers in the world when I say we would much rather have the gift of you being the best version of you than any tangible gift available. Spending a bunch of money or making breakfast in bed is far easier than investing in one's self.

I have some of my favorite mother's day gifts hanging on my walls and surrounding me. A clay butterfly, painted garish red with pipe cleaner antennae; an imitation Monet (painted years ago), a variety of small clay pots and vases, an animal print furry pillow carefully stitched... But when I look at those beautiful and cherished things, it is not the thing itself that makes it cherished: it's the memory of those chubby arms around my neck while they proudly presented me with the gift they'd labored over.

Now my kids are getting older and they stress over what to buy me. Flowers, foot rubs, etc. They are all really nice and really appreciated. In fact, today I found out that my oldest (who is far too like me and can't keep this sort of secret to save her life) is going to be driving all night with her friend in order to get home from college for the Summer on Mother's Day. I'm touched and excited beyond words!

Tonight I came across a couple of things that got me thinking. First I was chatting with a friend about how hard its going to be when my oldest goes to study abroad. She will be so far away and yet, I know it will be a dream come true for her so I encourage it wholeheartedly. And then I came across the ads... It set me to thinking: I would rather my daughter study abroad and wake each morning thinking "damn life is good!" than buy me anything. I'd rather she call me up on Mother's Day and tell me about her adventures. I'd rather my son get his driver's permit and my youngest daughter finish another standard in school. Why? Because that means I've done my job as a Mom.

My goal was never to raise three young people who adored me (although that is a lovely side effect!). My goal is to not only raise three productive members of society but three people who chase their dreams and become the best versions of themselves they can be; who really live life.

A uterus cake. What Mom wouldn't want this?

Naturally this made me think about my mother and I. What would she want for mother's day? I haven't done a real good job of diving in and living. Of being the best version of me that I can. I'm plodding forward and trying- but I know I can do more. So, I'm going to give my mother the best gift I can this year and in the years to come. I'll tell her I'm thankful and give her a hug if I'm living close enough to do so. But most importantly, I'm going to amp up my goal chasing. She doesn't have to know its in part for her. She won't need to any more than I need my kids to tell me. She'll just be damned glad to see it and feel honored on Mother's Day.